Figurative Language Fan T-Shirts

'It fits you like a glove, sir.'

"Yes, people do say I'm prickly, but it's a literal description, not an allusion to my personality..."

"Staff support"

"He's sworn never to say Boudicca, ShrOwsbury, whoM, or narrative."

"Who plays ball with the Dalai Lama?" "That's right." "What's right?" "Who plays ball with the Dalai Lama." "Why are you asking me?"

Two vending machines for fisherman: 'Live Bait' next to 'Dead as a Doornail Bait'

"Nd how did tht mke u feel?"

"Bet she says 'moo' before she says 'oink'."

Danth battle?

Life and Death

'He spoke his first words today Serge - 'ello. . . ello. . . ello'!'

"Hair spray"

"That's not what I meant by changing gear, Mrs.Robinson!"

'Our company has hit an icebery and is sinking fast. Of course, it's all very symbolic.'

"Destroyers"

Statue of Liberty holds a sign up reads: Who are We?

"My doctor said I have 'a reptile dysfunction.'"

(Gallerie Martorelli) (Art-Babble spoken here)

'Kindly explain to His Majesty that I didn't mean 'nincompoop' in the pejorative sense.'

GARDU VIN! (BEWARE!). Clown sees several pies to beware of.

Correct Spelling Lane.

'Turned out non-figurative again...'

'When did 'At Ease' become 'Chill'?'

Things we rarely hear: Bow...er...wow...er..um...woof/like tweet, I mean, y'know, tweet/whatchamacallit moo...

"All those in favor of saying 'It's a wrap' instead of 'Meeting adjourned' say 'Aye.' "

"And look sir - here's another interesting derivative of that phrase..."

'You mean to ssssay we have sssspeach imedimentssss?'

"Can you recommend a good exercise program?"

"I can't see it lasting!"

Only a handful of people are this small.

'No, my son. Arbitrage is not a bad word but perhaps it should be.'

'We don't call it 'plus size' anymore, we call it 'extra fun'.'

"Did you call me Madam?"

"But, you guys literally just said you'd die for one."

'Oh, it's different alright...but I'm not sure how much demand there'll be for a Noam Chomsky impersonator.'