Fictional Finance Fan Prints

At a creative writing workshop for accountants.

"The Net National Product rose slightly last month."

"Gentlemen, I'm pleased to say the firm is perfectly positioned to avoid chapter eleven and still be in existence this time next year."

LEMONADE 50 CENTS, 'I'm only seven years old -- I don't HAVE a credit rating yet!'

"I made money the old fashioned way. I inherited it."

'I'm sorry I missed your recital. Daddy was on the phone with his broker, checking on bond yields. It's another form of bonding, son.'

All bets are off as Round One begins in the "Dollars versus Donuts" World Championship title fight.

European currency on the edge.

Economy - USA.

'well of course I'm giving your portfolio the attention it deserves, I'm even wearing a black armband!'

What do you suggest we do about this?

Man pushing Euro sign up a hill.

Sub-prime Bear

'I enjoy the old-fashioned pleasures - a walk on the beach, plain food and piles of cash.'

'Like it? I LOVED it! The narrative gripped me from the first sentence and didn't let go until the final, heart-stopping page! And the CHARACTERS! Without question, Harris, this is the finest year-end financial report you've ever written!'

"Our initial public offering, .... The public has gotten wind of it!"

'Of course I'm squirreling away money!'

'We've gone to profit-sharing. But it's with the IRS.'

'Some mistakes are too much fun to make only once.'

'You go without me. I'm feeling a little down today.'

'This app is linked to my financial advisor and provides stimulated hand-holding when the market is down.'

Piggy Bank Coin I.V.

'Stocks rose on news that '90% of success is just being there.''

'Our tabby was pre-approved for a credit card!'

'And this just in from the stock market... buy, sell, buy, sell, buy, sell, buy!'

Circa 1490: The area we now know as Wall Street.

'Stocks were high...then low...then suddenly high again on news of a new drug to treat mood swings...'

Shareholders Meeting - We will be paying a dividend but I will not be announcing it here.

"It's a sci-fi-nance- when the DOW is 100,000."

'How much did you save this year?'

'How do you expect the Government to bail you out of your financial crisis if you don't pay your taxes?'

August is corporate earnings restatement season.

"Good news on Wall Street today"

'So, Pharaoh, what sort of collateral do you have to put down on this $2 billion Great Pyramid you want to build?'