Festive Phone Juggler T-Shirts

"Look, I don't mind being on hold, but my retirement party is starting in five minutes."

My phone is synced with my tablet, my tablet is synced with my laptop ... but none of them are synced with me."

"Hi, you've reached Susan's desk. I am monotasking right now, so I'll call you back it's the phone's turn again. Beep!"

"I told him not to rely on his GPS whe out running!"

Is this Randy the Love Doctor? Speaking. What ails you, brother? My wife doesn't have a job. The other night she told me it'd be nice if I helped out a little more at home. So I replied "hey, I don't ask you to come to my place of business and do my job for me." I see. Have you tried the "act like I never said it and wait for her to forget it" routine? Yes, sir. I also, tried the "don't-make-eye-contact-until-she-forgets-it" maneuver. I'm running out of ideas.

"Hello?"

Overworked

Santa's Party Trick - mishap with decoration juggling.

The Communicator

"I was just ringing to see if you got the e-mail about the letter I sent you?"

"Find out who's on vacation and then add this stuff to the workload on his desk."

"We'll have to pick this up later. My plane just went down, sharks ate my personal assistant, and apparently I'm winning some kind of surfing competition."

"Follow up appointment... the doctor will be retired by then."

'Call me back - the old trout's on the other line.'

"Yes dear, I know excessive mobile use is dangerous, that's not why I'm calling."

"Whose idea was it to create a Zoom session for first graders?"

Search for Extraterrestrial Intelligence. We received a communication fro Alpha Centauri, but it appears they just pocket dialed us.

'Take a message...'

"Can't do 3 p.m. — I'm scheduled for a migraine."

'It's for you.'

Easter Bunny HQ. United States. If all these states can move up their primaries, why can't I move Easter ahead of Valentine's Day?!

'Time management begins with the assumption that time will move slow enough to be managed.'

Woman holding two phones together.

"Gotta go."

Working From Home/Working From Home But It's the Holidays

Multitasking.

"Ho ordered the Cafe au Lait?"

"Normally, we only issue one phone to new hires, but we're bringing you in at a busy time."

'I can't talk now. I'm in the annual meeting.'

How to talk to a mathematically untalented boss.

'Let me put you on ignore ... I mean hold.'

Trapeze artists.

Anyone around here answer to the name of 'Sheep-for-brains'?

'Can't you find another date? The evening of the 24th of December is pretty much the only night I'm not free...'

"I want to cancel my 3 o'clock and my 4 o'clock, and oh! I want to cancel my 1:30!"