Festive Negotiator Gifts

Salesman in a Santa suit

Bad review for Santa

'OK. It's a deal. Find the bulb that doesn't work and you get to see another Christmas.'

Santa sits in front of computers with naughty data and nice data screens.

"Of course, I'm willing to negotiate. . ."

Help! Have to pay back a big world bank loan.

'Tom will coordinate our pre-holiday point-of-purchase displays and Mark will coordinate our post holiday point-of-return displays.'

"Just as I feared. Tariffs."

'Santa is the delivery man, I'm the CEO. Do you know what a CEO is, Lisa?'

'What if I promise not to look?'

"Sponsoring Christmas this year was an act of sheer marketing genius."

Thanksgiving Feast. Get lots of turkey, but not too much of you'll have to take a pause at the nap box. I'm skipping the cranberries and going for the green beans and the potatoes. I'm at the stuffing now and getting bonus points for extra gravy! Hey! There's a shortcut through the corn, straight to the pumpkin pie! I win! Not so fast. You missed the most important spot where you give thanks for your family and friends. Oh, you're right. It's okay that I didn't win. I'll get you tomor

Santa using the stock exchange to keep track of stocks and bonds being good or bad as well as going up or down

There IS a Santa Claus.

"I think Santa has taken us offthe naughty list this year."

"Smile if you're guilty!"

"Santa's trying to corner the futures market for coal in anticipation of his visit to Washington."

Santa Claus Always Delivers

"For Christmas, Santa is bringing sales in at plan."

Gracie hatches a plan to trap Santa.

Christmas card access

Christmas Group Therapy.

"Twenty percent bluechips, ten percent small-caps, five percent currency hedges and the remainder in cash. Get that list to Santa right away."

"It's only weeks to Christmas. We have him right where we want him."

"An aluminum baseball bat? Are you kidding? With the tariffs, my raw material costs are up 25%. How about some soybeans?"

'I can't talk now. I'm in the annual meeting.'

"Just how do you propose to pay for this giveaway?"

'He sees me when I'm sleeping, he knows when I'm awake...'

Keep your answers short and in the form of a question.

'Repetitive strain injury of the eyes?'

Santa and Robin Hood Talk Merger.

'Ho, ho, ho!'

"I think I found something in our price range!"

"A local retail survey shows holiday sales were flat...but the consumer cash meter hit an all-time high...while the holiday confidence index took a three-point dip."

'Thank goodness I remembered to bring those spares!'