Festive Dealmakers Gifts

'Why don't we make it simple this year, and you just extend me a line of credit?'

"And need I remind you, the 'art of the deal' is the lifeblood of this company."

"Here's what I'm gonna do."

"That's Paul, he's our head of partnerships..."

Tree in Dollar Shape.

"You are aware that we try to make money here, yes?"

'I'm 60-40 in favor of the 60.'

"He'll never win this negotiation. He's saddled with numbers...but we have anecdotes."

"Does it ever cross your mind that we make a lot of money because no one else wants to do what we do?"

"I hear the Universe is expanding - set up a meeting with their people."

'Now think, Harris, what did you do different on that day?'

It's a deal. You give me five analysts, three pundits, seven technicians and a soothsayer. I give you six experts, five professors, four consultants and a prognosticator.

'A hostile takeover just wasn't feasible, so we agreed to a hostile merger.'

...and if the Chairman rings, find out who he is.

'No hostile takeover bids beyond this point.'

"Can you believe those guys? We tell them absolutely, positively no further negotiations, and they stop negotiating!"

"Can you believe those guys? We tell them absolutely, positively no further negotiations, and they stop negotiating!"

"The Oaths of the Venture Capitalists."

"I'd prefer a win-win solution – but I'm open to just a win."

"Remember, negotiating is like buying fruit. You don't know what you'll get until you squeeze 'em a bit."

"I think Santa has taken us offthe naughty list this year."

"I came, I saw I takeovered."

Just Merged.

'Everything is negotiable, including my integrity.'

"Don't anybody move: this is a merger."

'You've become unbearable since you started working in that betting shop!'

Santa Claus Always Delivers

Unexpected Merger

"From now on we’ll no longer pay your trucking company for driving for us. We’d like to be paid by you because you’re allowed to transport our great products!"

"Souls are a dime a dozen. The best I can give you is ten free dance lessons."

Salesman in a Santa suit

'Sorry for interrupting. I didn't realize you were still trying to hammer out an agreement.'

"I told you negotiations would be more fun without a battery of lawyers."

'Would you like to see my sales presentation from where you're sitting? Or would you feel more comfortable in a head lock?'

'First I'd like to remind you of the true meaning of christmas - profits.'