Festive Music Fanatic Gifts

World's Most Obscure Christmas Songs

"It's Ker-chingmaaas!"

"It's not a party until someone gets plowed."

"Christmas drinks 'n' nibbles system"

Peephole in a pile of presents (colour).

'Looks like someone beat us to the punch.'

Christmas tree with wadded up lights.

'I was an egg in the Easter play.'

Mrs Claus - North Pole Dancing.

"Really! How many 'How to Survive the Festive Season' articles does one man need?"

"Sir, you're not on the list - we've checked it twice."

'Do I get to take an 'elfie' with Santa, too?'

Yo ho ho!

"Elfis"

Christmas sweater alternatives

"Hmm. The lights are on, but nobody's home..."

'Thanks mum, it's just what I always wanted!'

"If I survive this holiday, I'm moving to a pond."

Monks in monastry dancing, "They're high on apostasy again."

"I've had. . . um. . . just a small sherry. . ."

'And that,and that,and that...'

"As you can see, I've learned the alphabet."

Street Carolers

A Christmas tree self portrait

The other days of the year...

Merry Kissmas

'Let's open presents Christmas Eve AND morning. That way Christmas lasts for TWO days.'

'I agreed to guide you, My contract says nothing about pulling a sleigh,'

"Pull over, Rudolph! We'll have to charge the electric sleigh again..."

There's no place like Ho-Ho-Home

Elf of the Month

Are we human or are we Dancer, Prancer, Comet and Vixen

"It must be near New Year's Day...There are Easter eggs in the shop windows!"

"And you can REALLY make 345,000 deliveries in ONE day!"

"Normally after 365 years we'd be looking at a better figure, but not when you've only worked one day a year!"