Father Of Multiples Pillows

'You're going to have your future cut out for you, reading bedtime stories.'

"We realize that kids start using technology at a younger age these days, so our strollers come with Bluetooth, Wi-Fi and GPS."

"Come on, we've thought of 492 names surely we can get one more"

"I'm exempt from the company fitness program. I have triplets at home."

"Which one is yours?"

Why all mothers deserve a special day.

'It wasn't premeditated.

"Congratulations! It's centuplets!"

Fathers are Heroes

'Forget the wheel. Invent diapers.'

'I do set limits. For example, he wasn't allowed to use the tablet computer until after he downloaded a potty training app.'

Muscular Dad

"At high noon I'm takin' her to the zoo. How's one-thirty?"

'Actually the twins are not hard to tell apart. When I put them down, the one that cries is Dennis.'

"Early Father's Day Gift!"

"Honey, please don't talk to Daddy when he's in a chat room."

"Check those babies out."

'Well, nurse, it was a bit daft putting me next to this mirror!'

'I'm exempt from the company fitness program. I have triplets at home.'

"So, you see, what you were really looking for was a deeper connection with your father, and not the dentist's office down the hall."

'For me, this is actually an improvement; my wife is home with our octuplets.'

'The sonogram shows that you are carrying twins. I think they're going to get along very well. They seem to be hugging.'

Surprise

Triplets? Uh oh, we're going to need a smaller car.

Kangaroo with multiple pockets for lots of children...

My wife had quads

"Do you have any video games that would help reduce my role as a father?"

Chicken Walking Eggs

"I planned on cutting the cord myself but my phone app beat me to it."

"Shall we go talk with those au pairs?"

"We've been admiring your fathering techniques."

"After I introduce you to solids, I'm going to need your help with some computer stuff."

"I feel guilty because I introduced my Dad to video games and now he's addicted to them!"

Surprise on Ultrasound

'Hi. I'm a new dad. Do you have an app for that?'