Fashion-conscious Partner T-Shirts

"I’ll tell ya who’s got a ‘dark side’: my cat, that’s who. You should see what she did to my Manolo Blahnik pumps!"

Pony express. Pony express yourself. Pony express yourself so much he left.

Rap music

"I don't like your application."

"So what's this special distracting tactic you've developed?"

"I used to be a medium, but now I'm a large."

"Trust me, detainee orange is going to be huge this fall."

'I never said it was the comfy wear...I said it was the comfy look!'

"This diaper makes my butt look big..."

The Bland Leading the Bland

'...but since no fossils of dinosaur clothing have yet been found, what you see here is mostly speculation.'

Rainbow skier

'You're never going to win any race in those platform shoes.'

"How am I looking for my first day back at work?"

'Is that a wig?'

'I know we got the job, but trust me, ‘dress for success' always applies, even after the interview.'

"I want you to work late. Put on your overtime shoes."

'I like to stay fit. Or at least wear a lot of lycra.'

Man clothes shopping with wife sees signs for Women's Changing Rooms and Men's Stress Counsellor

"Apparently, the golf clothes and expensive golf clubs didn't help you play better."

"It's nothing new. We've always offered a complimentary beard wash following an order of ribs."

QR tattoo.

"Which one more says 'Cool Guy?'"

Surveying.

'Call me a slave to fashion, but how do I get down from these without killing myself?'

"Here, try this on." "But mom, everyone's wearing three ply. I'll be a freak."

"I promise I won’t get upset. Just tell me why you chewed up her Chanel pumps."

'My Mom wears her cap backwards to keep the sun out of the eyes in the back of her head.'

A Muscle checking out some shirts made for Muscles

'Why didn't you stop it?' - 'I didn't want to get my new gloves dirty.'

'Uh Uh. No way am I sitting on those. That color is just wrong for me!'

My tailor can't seem to accept the fact that I've grown as a person.

Young Frankenstein