Farewell Philosophers Pillows

Thinking Gears

Emergency Phone.

Euripides: 'If we could be twice young and twice old, we could correct all our mistakes.'

'Agreed, 40 years is a long time to wander around, but think of the travel expenses.'

Arthur Schopenhauer

Saguaro Cactus Regrets.

"Son, the world is full of disappointments. About 7.7 billion of them."

"There may be a moral equivalent of war, but, by God, there is not moral equivalent of money."

"They're very time-sensitive."

"But, Jesus - you can't become an atheist."

The first 'outside the box' thinker.

Advanced Zen for Couch Potatoes: Earl becomes One with his Lazy-Boy.

'Eve wants a second opinion about the apples.'

Self Checkout

Mall of ages

"Actually, I'm pretty sure aging naturally and aging gracefully are mutually exclusive."

Balding Autumn Tree.

"Seventy-five isn't the new anything."

'I inherited therefore I am'

"I see he finally got rid of that idiotic comb-over."

'You want a pizza with everything? -- Do you comprehend the philosophical implications of that?

'It's just a phase they're going through.'

Lost and forgotten department

"Since I proved in my last lecture that none of us really exist...I'm going to change this to a cooking class!"

"I hope I age as well as you, Dad. Except for the neck."

'Well, you know what the say...near death is the new 80.'

'I didn't realize you were so fond of it, Sir Isaac.'

Let me warn you, toots. Celebrity is like radioactivity: you start with a big bang, then comes years with a half-life of slow decay.

Glass/Cans/Geriatrics.

Statue Farts.

A long way towards retirement...

"Apparently, 60 is the new dead."