Farewell Gatherings Pillows

Goodbye and Good Riddance

If you bathe a skunk in tomato juice, it will smell like a dog. A bird in the hand is better than two in your shorts. Never wear aqua after Thanksgiving. Unconventional wisdom.

Christmas Tree

"Thanks to my wedding planner, everyone in the wedding is still talking to each other."

"First I drink, then I barbecue — that's my secret."

#Thanksgiving #Nofilter

"I'm afraid the challah got a little burnt this week."

Wedding Day Itinerary.

Every time you make a blend, somewhere, a wine maker dies.

'I swear, if he didn't always pick up the tab, I'd never go drinking with him.'

"I think I'm having pre-traumatic stress disorder."

Barbecued dessert, anyone? The coals are PERFECT now!

Illustration from an Unpublished Novel

"Is there any way I can un-drink this wine?"

"I ask that today is a good day...a day that brings family together...to show how we need one another."

The prying mantis,

The devil you know and his plus one

"Ron didn't realise he was so popular."

celebrating a birth.

"Tia Carmen's not happy unless she can send people away with a plate of leftovers for the road."

"Truth is relative at these reunions. It depends on which relative you talk to."

"Great job of acting! You really appeared excited about Aunt May's 'famous' green bean casserole."

Miniature Cattle Fanciers

'We haven't had a family get-together like this since we were kids - Hey! Where are mum and dad?'

Newton had actually discovered gravity at a family dinner in his early childhood.

Revival Meeting - Simultaneous translation of all talking in tongues.

"Pssst! I had some CGI done."

"Here's the baby's first birthday, her second, her third, look at her gifts..."

Children's Party

Paul goes home for the holidays

"At least this year she got rid of the seat belts."

Any idea how long your family might be visiting?

"What time did you say you wanted me to start drinking?"

'Sure, I'm a working mother - is there any other kind?'

'The Ambassador will not be pleased, Madame.'