Fans Of Punny Humor Gifts

Do they always make a big deal over the first fraction of the season here? Yes, it's a "break with tradition"!

'Who wants to be examined first?'

"Wa-wa. . . wa-wa. . . wa-wa. . ."

'We have to forfeit, Three of our players got squashed on the way over here,'

"What are you talking about? We don’t even have a toilet seat!"

"My New Year's resolution is to lose thirty-eight thousand pounds."

'Upon further review, the pig did not have control of the ball prior to being eaten...'

"Turn off cell phones violators will be over ruled."

"Extreme? Maybe. But I have the best behaved school in the district."

'According to his will, Tiddles left the bulk of his estate to himself. Because, he still has eight lives left.'

"Your four-o'clock is here."

It's not a stampede … It's a flash mob!

Signs reads 'Do Not Feed the Boids.'

'I think my back is baroque!'

'I download music from a radio station in South Korea, and I got Seoul music.'

Cow Pat Planning

"I told you not to order the Zamboni."

'I can't come out and play because I'm in 'Time-Out.' Although here at Grandma's it's more like 'Time-Out Lite.' '

"Waiter! - will my pizza be long?"

"Oi, who are you bleedin' looking at?"

"You read the exit sign. The eye chart is behind you."

"And this is Paul - he's in charge of our TikToks..."

"Hey, look on the bright side, at least we're not wine coolers."

'See what happens when you forget to feed your pet?'

The one thing that drives elephants wild is sickeningly sweet elevator music.

'You're sexy when your mind is somewhere else.'

"Do you remember what you had for lunch last Thursday?"

'So, Harkness, I see that you have a very checkered background!'

'Hold this til Tues and I'll pay you back, squid pro quo.'

"Can I get you your bill sir?"

Before the wheel.

"I'm keeping you back after school!"

"It's just not the same."

'Alright alright, I was joking: I won't deliver you to a couple of mongooses...'

"Don't mind me, Riche – it's just the rabies talking."