Fan Of Classic Tales With A Twist T-Shirts

Why don't we wait until we know each other better before I tell you how I got the name 'Humpty'.

'Couldn't Peter claim Mr. McGregor's garden was an 'attractive nuisance?'

"Go ahead and eat her, she's a pain in the a**."

'Br'er Fox said 'I'm going to throw you into the briar patch'...And Br'er Rabbit said, 'Please,please don't taser me!''

'That's not really what I meant by 'let your hair down', Rapunzel.'

Robinson decided to name him 'Casual Friday'.

Don Quixote

Through the Looking Glass - Queen Alice with Frog

Falstaff

Thomas Hardy

'Ignore it! It's just some of the local kids trying to get in for free.'

Alice Through the Looking Glass - Alice Climbs Through The Mirror.

'Come on Jill, they say the water's well good.'

Alice in Wonderland: Alice and the Dodo.

Upper West Side Story

'This bottle of whisky will give you 'Dutch courage', it's the best I can do.'

The hare and the tortoise - the rematch.

"Why do you automatically assume that I'll fly too close to the sun?"

"Long Johns Silver."

'I wish I'd never seen Lost, now.'

"The true story"

"I crawl that I may savor the richness and diversity of people and places along the way."

"Have you tried unplugging and plugging it back in?"

'Wow, I can't believe she fell for that granny getup.'

"Well, I just experienced my first misophoia trigger."

"No, let down your hair!"

David Anderson vs. Goliath

Goldilocks reads note from three bears: Gone for a walk in the woods. Your porridge is on the table.

Frank and Ernest Updated Fairy Tales. Do you mean fair like "pretty" or fair like "evenhanded"?

'Icarus, I think your sat nav is failing.'

'Er. . . I had an appointment with Dr. Jekyll. . .'

"He's really gone uphill, hasn't he?"

'It was owned by a little ol' lady who didn't drive it. She used a motor scooter on Saturdays.'

Ugly sisters

Count and Figaro