Family Storytelling Time T-Shirts

"That little piggy can't have roast beef - I'm a vegetarian!"

Late night teddy reading

Swan Fairy Tales

"Just let her believe in fairies a little while longer."

'Please make us instruments of Thy peace, starting with Bucky Sims.'

"Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down, broke his crown and Jill said 'I told you so'."

Shadow Puppet Bunny Threatened By Shadow Hawk

"Just kick back and enjoy this. These are the nest years of our lives!"

'She's just great with the children.'

'It's really more of a family forest than a family tree.'

True confessions.

'Thou shalt not steal...except for bases.'

"Mmmm! Bears hibernate in the winter. Cats can hibernate anytime we want!"

'Read me the one about the ant and the obsessive-compulsive grasshopper.'

Now Simon would have nightmares about his mother's failing eyesight.

"So, when he says, 'What a good boy am I,' Jack is really reinforcing his self-esteem."

'Put some feeling into it. I can't tell the difference between the lion and the mouse.'

Ant story: 'and so they worked all day and they worked all night and then they worked some more, the end.'

"Customers who bought 'The Three Little Pigs' also bought...."

"Oh,oh - here comes quality time again."

"Good evening, Susan. We've decided it's time you get your own bed."

"And if that diamond ring don’t shine, Poppa will probably take it back to 47th Street and get something for your mother."

"It seems like only yesterday that Dad told me I'll be an adult before I know it."

"Your momma lied to you, boy."

"That dream catcher may be working a little too well."

"No, son, you’re not ‘M for Mature.’"

'And you're telling me this, why?'

"I'm actually pretty ready for bed."

Children's Party

"When I was young my parents couldn't afford to give me too much, too soon."

'Am I looking sad or happy in the appropriate places?'

'Riley, I think it's time you learned the truth... You're adopted.'

"She married and then divorced, and then she married and divorced, and then she married and lived happily ever after."