Family Reading Time Pillows

"That story had an engaging plot, but 'lived happily ever after' is an unsatisfying denouement."

'Let the creepy crawly hunt begin!'

'Couldn't Peter claim Mr. McGregor's garden was an 'attractive nuisance?'

I like the Jets...I guess

"They grow up so fast."

"Christmas - what a fuss eh?"

'William, I've decided to go back to work so I can get a little rest during the day.'

Swan Fairy Tales

"She's been so creative lately."

Haircuts

"Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down, broke his crown and Jill said 'I told you so'."

"Mom! Your cell phone’s ringing ... it’s Dad!"

"...and the humans turned Neville into 80,000 toothpicks..."

"I think I've reached that age when I don't remember if I've forgotten something."

'She's just great with the children.'

"Is she breastfeeding in public?! That's disgusting!"

"They’re baseballs. You throw ’em."

'You and Rags working together make great dinosaur finders.'

"Can I have another sausage Dad?"

"Actually, I'm really looking for blessings that aren't in disguise"

Boy and Bear and Monster

Rusty, not believing in God, seized his chance...

Office pics on dinner table.

'Your fancy new grill works great. . .and we didn't even have to turn it on.'

"Mom, does the Russian borscht you made for dinner give me foreign-policy experience?"

"If you hold it to your ear you can hear the ice caps melting."

Photographer Phone: 'Okay everybody, SMILE!'

Do you have any cookies you aren't using?

Monkey Curling Lion's Mane.

"Some advice please...How do I squeeze 9 days work into 5 and still see my family?"

'Congratulations, dear! Your home cooked dinner was so good you'd think it was an expensive frozen entree!'

Swinging

"If you insist on doing all the voices, Dad. Don't you think father bear should have a deeper voice than Goldilocks?"

'He's bound to wake up sometime!'