Family Member With Pets Pillows

'Cat or dog?' - 'A little of both.'

"I hate it when he gets all Robin Williamsy."

'It's so cold in here, and the heat is on full blast!'

'Perhaps you'd like to explain this,'

'Our human learned how to sit, shake hands, and heel with me. She learned a lot in obedience school!'

"The puppy just discovered cats have claws."

"Our forefathers died to give us our most cherished freedom. The fight to absolutely terrify every dog and cat in the land every 4th of July."

"There's nothing like a long, hot shower."

"His real name is Major, but everyone call him GET DOWN!"

'Super Dog'

Girl wags her pony tail as dog wags his tail.

"There's something about ripping the stuffing out of a toy that turns me into a wild dog. I'm afraid I actually like that feeling."

'Of course I'm being catty. How else do you expect me to act?'

I'm beginning to regret buying that Roomba.

Chasebook

'My owner is feeding me way too much organic food.'

"Odd, since neither of us overfeeds her by even the smallest amount."

"I see you mister mail carrier... that's it, just keep walking... don't even think abo—did you just look at my house?! Are you looking for trouble? Cujo ain't got #!@* on me."

"...and yet it doesn't quite capture his thoughtful, contemplative side."

Dog and family arrive at 'Mount Ruffmore' National Park, instead of Mount Rushmore.

"Me, I think Master and Mistress are incompetent: why else would they need a butler, 3 maids, 2 cooks, 5 gardeners, a pool boy and 2 personal assistants?"

Should I bark? Flow chart for dogs

Dog History

"Honestly, I prefer stick."

"DID YOU SEND THIS?"

'He's hoping to get out on appeal.'

"If you don't make up your mind who's taking me out, I'll do it right here."

"Have you consider the possibility that I don't want the paper?"

"I can never remember, how much do we tip?"

I know. Isn't it funny how people and their pets start to look alike?

"Yes, you were in a breech position, and it was the first time I was really pleased to see the vet..."

'We don't do tricks.. because then they'll begin to expect it.'

'Vet clinic? I'd like to make an appointment for a physical. It's been seven years.'

"Yeah, going to the dog park is good, but I must prefer a more intimate walk with my Master..."

Homemade dog biscuits.