Family Meal Architect Gifts

We are in the middle of a nationwide health-care crisis, eat your broccoli!

A woman standing beside a stove full of steaming pots and pans.

Chez Nous Menu

"Who ordered the double chocolate parfait with a cherry on top?"

'I'm worried about him, he eats his vegetables, but not his dessert!'

"Mom, does the Russian borscht you made for dinner give me foreign-policy experience?"

"Be sure and eat your frozen vegetables."

'Thanksgiving's no holiday for turkeys or the women who cook them.'

"Can you turn these mashed potatoes into french fries?"

Making healthy substitutions at mealtime

Family Salutes as Father Comes Home.

"When it comes to turkeys, Mom, you sure know your stuff-ing."

A man and baby wearing bibs

"Can you reinvent the classic grilled cheese for me?"

'A hacker broke into our computer and, in an act of human kindness, deleted your mother's recipe for peppers and meat loaf.'

'I'm saving some for leftovers tomorrow.'

"I'm stuffed. But in a good way."

"Ok, Griffin — let him see Mom’s roast!"

"All good things must come to an end...unless I use both of my giant-size super-pots."

"You're close, but you're not the record. The record for one family in one booth—all from out of state, each ordering a complete breakfast—was set in 1978, with fifteen."

"Mum, why can't we just have a normal Sunday roast like other families?"

"Mom told me to make my vegetables disapear."

Non-wall St merger: Mom's Home Cooking...Pop's Cafe!

"Mother will never be able to rest on her laurels. If they're green, she'll cook them."

"Mom, Eugene picked all the peanuts off the pizza!"

"Forget George, he scarfs down everything in sight. Aunt Rose and Grandma are good for slipping us a slice. Most important, the kids are sloppy. We're bound to find some juicy scraps under their chairs. Stay alert!"

'Carrot salad, carrot casserole, carrot juice, carrot cake - I want steak!'

Pregnancy Test

'Your mother spent a lot of time on this meal, so wag your tail even if you don't like it.'

'After you with the camouflage.'

'For the last time, Megan, she won a blue ribbon at the Imperial Valley Fair... I mean, my hands are tied here.'

"So...that's B11, C8, F5, and A3?"

"Oh -- just scrape it off."

"Honestly, all three of them were mistakes."

"I mean, he does have a point."