Family Dynamic Lover Pillows

"Truth is relative at these reunions. It depends on which relative you talk to."

Old and young

"Can I borrow the car keys?"

Wedding Day Itinerary.

"Whoa. Someone needs their diaper changed."

"We're ecstatic about our new au pair."

"I thought it would be nice if we had a forum where we could get together and have screaming tantrums."

"Look at their faces! What did they expect? They never visited her! Of course the will says her money goes to the cat shelter. . ."

Lady asking her fiance's son if she can be his new mother.

A child as a pet substitute.

"Nothing else in my room can spin on the floor like a bottle."

'We're playing I'm a mummy with lots of different daddies!'

"Could you please downgrade this to a C? High expectations bring out the worst in my parents."

"Ours will be the first mixed marriage in my family. Dog people NEVER marry cat people."

'So, you're an organ-grinder's monkey? A professional beggar? Is that how you intend to support my daughter?'

"All I ask is a chance to ruin my life in my own way."

"I'm so sorry that I screamed...I had a terrible dream: the kids had to leave college and live with us again...Oh, Ed, it was horrible!"

'You are right, honey, it's raining too much. It's not the best day to visit my mom.'

Brilliance runs in my family, but in a zig-zag pattern.

"Well that's the last of our offspring gone - let battle commence."

'Dad, I don't need a two-thirds majority to over-ride your veto. I've got mom.'

"We need to have a serious talk."

'Male, 38, still living with his parents. They asked us to keep him overnight, so they could change the locks.'

'I didn't hear you calling. I can't listen to everybody who yells at me.'

"Daddy, can I have a pony killed?"

"I thought we agreed we wouldn't tell your Dad about the Easter Bunny till next year."

Well, obviously we can't live with my parents

"...and then while I was at soccer practice they moved house."

"The kids - Prince Englebert and Princess Felicia - would like us to move into the olde monarchs' home."

Bears: 'Mummy, mummy can I sleep over at Jessica's this winter.'

'I'm leaving my wife because of another woman. Her mother.'

You never caw.

'Yoy know perfectly well WHICH corner, Jamie!'

"Think about it: Toby's the only ram here, so we have to be half brothers!"

'It's good, Timmy, but it's not refrigerator good.'