Family Circus Fan Mugs

'The tides have finally turned. Our daughter is losing sleep over us.'

"Yes, mom, we're all getting plenty of exercise."

"Oh just ignore him!...he always shows off when we have visitors!"

"Really, self-taught - that's remarkable!"

"I suppose you think that's funny."

Clown Delivering Babies.

"Support the head."

"YOU pass him on the left."

"I can't wait for things to get back to normal."

A high wire act walks over to a bottle of wine.

The relay race

"So. . . how long have people NOT been laughing at you. . . ?"

Parental Training Course

'What went particularly well?'

"That's impressive, but I asked you to roll over."

Pickles the Clown: Son of Bonzo and Gwen. A Pro to the End.

'Mmmm. How do you get the custard so creamy? You must give me the recipie!'

"Hah, good luck to them when they try to flush THAT!"

"I wonder if Congress has any openings."

"I wish we could go back to waltzes - this boogie woogie is killing me."

'That's the worst case of fleas I've ever seen...!'

"Young Master downright lied to Mistress! I can smell he didn't use soap or shampoo when he took his bath!"

'I told you Ko-ko that you don't have to even think of retirement - the phone stopped ringing for you years ago!'

'He's got a terrific memory but dreadful eyesight.'

"OK, OK, I believe that you were an ‘all-state gymnast at obedience school’... now please get down."

The Paunch & Judy Show

'You won't count my trunk as a carry-on; I have to buy two seats because of my size, and you don't give out complimentary peanuts? Isn't this a jumbo jet?'

'If you painted on a smile instead of that frown you might make more balloon sales...'

"Kids, could you do Mommy a huge favor and go really far away from me? Thanks."

'It wasn't the baby's crying that kept me awake last night...it was my husband's.'

'It's ironic: I was employed to beg by an organ grinder, and now, I beg because I'm unemployed...'

Carly Simon - clowns in my coffee.

Pastor Charles - also known as 'Charlie Chaplain'

Socially Distancing Clowns

Performing dog