Family Business Navigator Pillows

"I want you to treat him just like you would anyone else whose father owns the combine."

'I've increased your salary son, but next time you want a rise come to me instead of your mother.'

'We're issuing a hostile takeover bid. I hope this doesn't affect things between us, Dad.'

'Shhhh. Fido inherited seventy percent of this company.'

"And this is my junior partner, my son, Ira."

'In the interest of spending more time with my children, I've put Bobby and Emily in charge of corporate strategy.'

'Don't worry, Dad. I'm going to turn this company around 360 degrees!'

'sugar and spice my eye.'

'I almost get out the door and then my mom yells...'Don't you know it's February?!' And here I am again...looking like an eskimo.'

"'Parent' should always be an action verb."

'None of the other things had instructions.'

"Me? I thought you were raising them."

'Someday, son...all this will be Mine.'

"I think he's outgrown the baby gate."

"We've given it a great deal of thought and we decided we're going to give in to everything you want at all times."

"Let's split up the jobs for taking care of the baby. I'll take care of what goes in to him. . . you take care of what goes out!"

Maps to all the corporate trap doors for sale here!

"Everything started when I became a stay-at-home-mom of three little monsters."

"Mom, Suzy keeps coming closer than 6 feet to me."

"I know it's 3 a.m. but don't you think this is a good time to discuss spending the holidays with my mother."

'I've survived here by always maintaining my honesty, integrity, and plausible deniability.'

'It's a terrific family business: We have about 53 staff-members...'

"This is a family operation, Ben, and we're evicting you from our family."

"Ironically, this all started with a little poke on Facebook."

'I think he's proud of his ability to be in the way in more than one room at a time.'

Mother's Day: 2nd Sunday in May, Others Day: Every day before and after the 2nd Sunday in May.

Kids go to school and mom goes to the psychiatric clinic.

'There's no need for you to state your opinion, son. Just lipsynching mine will do fine.'

'Do you realize that I spend more time out than I do in?'

"Wet wipe?"

The Finding Yourself Hour.

"Will you turn that TV down? Can't you see I'm on the phone?"

My changing Body: A Guide For New Fathers

"This baby will hold more than a hundred and twenty-five cubic feet of family rancor."

'No Jennifer! I never head of mad broccoli disease.'