Family Branch Climber T-Shirts

"Are you insane?!" The Velveteen Skunk

"They must be grown-up ducks, because they're eating the crusts too."

'Ahhh...'

Uncle demonstrating chemical experiments to children

T"ruly, Susan, I envy no man."

"Oh, no - Karen baked a cake so dense that not even light can escape."

"Hi-yah!"

'There they go - off on their own - and a finer bunch of fledgelings one couldn't ask.'

'You and Rags working together make great dinosaur finders.'

The No No No's

Duke of Clarence (Later William IV) Promenading with Family

"Have you and Tim picked out a name for the career obstacle yet?"

"Can I have another sausage Dad?"

"I'm not eating cookies before dinner. I'm having cookies for dinner!"

"What makes you think I'm dripping it on my shirt?"

'I can't believe I didn't get that promotion. So many people have passed me by I feel like a road sign on the highway to success.'

Bringing Your Child To The Bicycle Race

"See this jelly wobbling. It was waving goodbye."

"Mom, does the Russian borscht you made for dinner give me foreign-policy experience?"

'Thank goodness you were wrong mom, dad says a period is what comes at the end of a sentence.'

"I say it's Kale, and I say it's spinaches shitfaced uncle."

"Mommy's going to teach you how to make a hamburger."

"Whose turn is it to lick the knife?"

The Salesman

'No. The television screen hasn't gone red - You've got tomato ketchup all over your glasses!'

Like many of those in tribicles, Mitch dreamed of one day moving up to the real deal.

'Roy! For the last time, don't wave that red one in front of your Dad.'

'Never mind about buying that trampoline. I love your new bed!'

"Oh, Aunt Em, it wasn't a dream. It was a place. And you and you and you ... and you were there. But not that man with the straitjacket."

A child interrupting family prayers

Chicken Little was correct about something falling, unfortunately, it was an axe, and not the sky.

"Gracie, today I'm teaching you a Bermudez family tradition...passed down from generation to generation! Vamonos! Out! Now!"

'What a time to return from climbing! There's not way your coming into this house tonight.'

'Look, Dad, I made a pair of boots out of your chest waders.'