Faithful Fitness Fans Pillows

"This model is great. It monitors my heart rate, vitals and counts my blessings."

'If you give up alcohol, cigarettes, sex, red meat, cakes and chocolate, and don't get too excited, you can enjoy life for a few more years yet.'

Dietician to man: 'To address your spare tire we must first get in touch with your inner tube.'

'Maybe we should have gone for a pommel horse.'

"Relax. I just had a vitamin."

Businessman uses yoga moves while reviewing financial news on computer

'No, honestly, it's just diet and exercise.'

"If we carry them home we’ll get at least one workout."

"I wish I had her jewelry." "I wish I had his wife." "I wish I had her figure." "I wish I had his money."

"It's true: no more burpees."

Yoga vs. Prosecco

"Uh-oh. My inner GPS is recalculating."

A small number of people are afraid of heights, but there is an epidemic fear of widths.

"I could catch a bicyclist, well maybe not a bicyclist, but I could catch a jogger, definitely."

"Daddy, you have to flatten this curve."

"Lets find another beach, this one has too much competition."

"He's a dedicated lifter, but he always skips leg day."

"I have to rest. The 'check engine' light on my activity tracker just came on."

'I'm looking forward to parents' night. I'm going to ask these people their diet secrets.'

'Me? I took my cardio to the next level.'

Exercise Bars

Sisyphus during Covid

Reasonableman

"I have to get down to 125 pounds before I go back to my real gym."

Zumbie: Zumba for zombies.

"Can I still do my pilates?"

Now that we've developed lungs, it's only a matter of time before we feel guilty about not exercising.

I feel better than ever physically but I'm totally obsolete at work. In life 60 is the new 40. In the workplace 40 is the new 60.

"Well, that will never be a yoga pose."

"I run around this high school track every morning."

"What now?" Runners disturbing loggers

'The first thing you need to do is lose 40 pounds of that baby boomer fat.'

Fitness Camp. I'm trying to strengthen our boarders!

Oh boy, lucky you were there: I was cramping up. I need a few minutes rest if you don't mind...

Gym. Check in Here. The only time I feel the burn is when I pay the memberbship fee.