Fairway Aficionado Pillows

Golfers lost on the road

"I warned you not to use that club...now look, you struck oil!"

Race track - with the race being to apply the white lines between lanes

Golfer hanging from tree branch to play difficult shot.

'Lost your ball again?' - 'No, I've got my ball. I've lost my club.'

"Getting the ball in the hole on the first swing is good isn't it?"

Disraeli's Reform Bill Passes the Committee Stage

'No,silly-I asked for a sand WEDGE!'

"On the weekend I finally beat the club pro...so I don't need you anymore!"

'Yes, Mr. Osborne, this is an intervention. Your family had no other choice. Golf is an illness...'

"Oh no, it's gone in that silly little hole again."

Club House. An eighty dollar green fee! -- I haven't even teed-off yet and I'm already in the hole!

'You've never played golf before, have you?'

'Your direction is good! Now try for distance.'

"Extremely Minature Golf." They're playing golf down there today. A chlorophyll molecule is collecting green fees and some H2O molecules are a water hazard. The adrenaline group seems to have gotten a burst of energy -- They're playing through the slower groups in front of them. I see the electron is good, always a negative score. And the nucleus is a solid player, every shot is hit right down the center. But nobody can match the DNA's consistency --- He's able to perfectly replicate his s

'I read that the ball is on the surface of the club for just 0.00035 of a second, so even when you take 100 shots to go around, you are only getting less than 1 second of golf for your money...'

'I'd do better if I knew all the words you know!'

It's a tradition. On hole number 1 in the first round of the season, Ernie always says that's the best shot I've hit this year!

Tee for Two!

'This has to be the longest course I've ever played!' (Sign with Gas/Food/Lodging Next Tee)

I warned you to keep it low!

'Whenever Ralph finds a golf ball he puts it in the basement.'

'Well done, Evan; you only missed a hole-in-one by 7 strokes.'

'I don't know what these things are, but Master spends a lot of time away from the house with them...'

'Grown-ups sure make playing a lot of work.'

"I think I see your problem...You're standing too close to the ball"

Caddy With A Cool Box

'What a divot?'

'Did you see a ball come this way?'

Golf

A man holding a golf club eying up his shot

'Thanks, but I know all about the Dogs of the Dow. My problem is I end up with them, instead of starting.'

'So if it goes to the right it's a slice, to the left it's a hook...and down the center.'

'My name is John and I'm a golfaholic!'

This Sportsman is 'Playing Through the Green'.