Fact Collectors Pillows

Useless information desk at trivia buff convention

"These are the very weapons your mother and I used in our famous duel."

Before the Internet

'It's genuine 17th century satsuma - and the pair would have been worth ?14,000.'

It's estimated that millions of trees are planted by forgetful squirrels.

'Heirloom Tiffany Lamp Delivery. I Brake for Everything.'

Funky Facts: Monkeys.

His cubicle had come to be known as 'Teddy Bear Heaven'.

"Ever notice how grateful people are when you present them with facts contrary to their beliefs?"

'... Going once...going twice...aaaand--sold! To the gentleman in the front row for a thousand words.'

'...So you claim this is genuine Rembrandt?'

The Month of July

'15% of Americans don't have chairs in their living rooms, and of that 15%, 73% don't even realize it.'

"Twenty-five thousand, do I hear thirty thousand? Let me remind you all - this is the last Thin Mint cookie in the sleeve..."

"Fetch, Ernie, fetch!"

"It's a flip phone. I guess we can document this as an ancient, archaeological discovery."

'There are facts,there are factoids, and there are just plain fun facts.'

Who's Dead

''Masterpiece Theater' will not be seen tonight, so that we may bring you 'Slushpile Showplace'....'

Funky Facts: Turtles.

"I'm sorry, I can't assist with this request."

Funky Facts: Elephants.

"I wonder what this was for."

'How old is this vase?'

"Hmm interesting Hallmark..."

Master Humphrey's visionary friends

'Your entire library consists of nothing but tabloids bound in Corinthian leather?'

"I've seen a lot in my time, Ted, but it was always from the cheap seats."

"I never expected you to pay through the nose."

'...but the good new is your old Enron stock has become a high-priced collectible!'

"Sorry, but statistics don't lie: hippopotamus are more dangerous to humans than lions..."

1000 different economic theories trading cards. Collect them all.

'Mummy, Daddy, this is Wayne. Wayne once sat in a bath full of jelly for 24 hours.'

'Stamp auction' WW2 Victory stamps on two fingers