Eyecare Aficionado Prints

'I think your intraocular pressure is very high.'

'It's the essence of springtime. You're really enjoying it.'

'Transylvania's most famous Optometrist 'Count Mracula'.'

"I've had these glasses since I was a kid, when my doctor told me I'd grow into them..."

'I can tell you one thing, Madam. These ears have been neglected...

'I'm sorry, Madam Zola. I'm afraid you no longer have second sight.'

"My approach is nontraditional, but from a uniquely Western perspective."

'He wasn't doing a bit good, until I changed his glasses.'

Man has applied car wax and sees the whole car melt in the sun.

'No cheating'

'You have to do something...My husband just doesn't look at me the way he used to.'

'We auto mechanics get no respect!'

Optometrist Humor

'No thanks. I'm just squinting...'

'You've had the eye exam. Now buy the t-shirt!'

"Doric Ionic Ozempic"

'Inadvertently, Optometrist Niles Frobe triggers the Global Financial crisis' 'You have a bad case of eyestrain. I want you to keep your eyes off the ball for a few weeks!'

'I'm thinking about laser eye surgery.'

'Throw them back They're not what nine out of ten eye doctor's recommend for dry eyes when stranded on a desert island.'

'Having trouble getting used to your new bi-focals'

'Those look good on you, They help make your nose look smaller,'

'Transylvania's most famous Optometrist 'Count Macula'.

'I think the eye doctor got my prescription glasses mixed up with somebody else's.'

"He did well with his eye exam but was disappointed to find out that laser surgery won't help out his score when he plays laser tag."

You know your getting old when you have to put on your reading glasses to trim your eyebrows...

'The smallest line I can read says 'Made In China'.'

Same Day Glasses - "They'll be ready in a month. It's not my fault you couldn't read the fine print."

'I'm after a longer dipstick. This one doesn't reach the oil anymore.'

'It's yet another customer survey asking about our last oil change. Was it poor, fair, very good, blissful or orgasmic?'

"What is it going to be, a breakfast or shampoo?"

"So I tell the ophthalmologist my eyes have been really sensitive to light lately and what's he do? He shines bright lights right in them!"

Mowing His Hairy back.

'Laser Surgery While You Wait.'

'I own Acme Drug stock, so fill this prescription with their product.'