Expulsion T-Shirts

'No, I haven't been sent home early...I've been sent home permanently!'

The fate of the emigrant

'Well, there's something you don't see every day'

"It's not face paint. I'm transitioning into a snow leopard."

"That was totally....what's the word I'm looking for?"

"Where do you think we are in the food chain right now?"

'Now, think hard about it: Do you want to be known as the one who ate the last Dodo?'

"Since global warming the Abominable Snowman is much less frightening than he used to be."

'Is there an E-Reader Edition?'

'The Brothers of the Order of Saint Orson, patron saint of fried foods'

Movies vs. Films

'...And they're giving us sixty million years to get in compliance.'

'It's another cookery programme but It's aimed at children.'

Je Suis Charlie

Emigrating to France.

S**t Threw a Goose

'Hey, honey bun!'

'Ok, this sty is great and all, but can we get some huge explosions? Wilbur, could you say 'it's about to get real'?'

"Apricot pit?! Are you kidding, Mister? This stuff knocks raw avocado and almond nut outta the water!!!"

"Look, someone tattooed that building!"

Quiet Quitting

"When I grow up, I want to impeach a president."

Bomb disposal officer sits at desk near workboxes: IN/ ERT.

Stand back - while I whip something up

"You go on ahead. I'm going to hang out here for the next few months until everyone stops saying the word 'caucus.'"

"What should we do today? Swim against the tide or go with the flow?"

Worker escapes his cubicle by climbing a beanstalk.

"Goodbye prison, hello 24/7 work culture!"

'I recommend looking down your wife's top, sir.'

The Garra Rufa's idea of a Grand Day Out.

Stress Prison - The fictional jail you imagine being sent to so you can catch up with Netflix and reading.

"And, little by little, over the next ten minutes, he was able to dig his way to freedom."

"You constantly saying 'I'll see you Monday' won't change the fact that you're fired."

"Have you ever licked cream off a woman's body?"

"The scientists are coming back to study us, so I want you both to be on your best behaviour this time!"