Expecting A Baby Pillows

Baby in womb chooses from multiple choice pregnancy symptoms...

'Yep. There it is. It's definitely a boy.'

'With these alternative fertility treatments you never quite know how things turn out,'

'That IS her care pathway.'

'Baby on board.'

'What? Didn't your parents ever tell you who delivers babies???'

Penguin giving birth

"Mommy is having another baby. Let me assure you that any paradigm shift will be incremental, core values remain family-centric, and Mommy is committed to assimilation and building synergy."

Too posh to push - Cesarean Clinic.

Sonographer and pregnant couple looking at images of the fetus on a screen with options to share the image on various social media platforms

'You're due in September, however, since you're not mentally ready, let's make it October!'

Pregnant couple: I'm so glad I'm a woman/I'm so glad I'm a man.

"Please, don't hurt me—I have a wife, and I'm gradually becoming O.K. with the possibility of having children!"

"So! When's the big day?"

Ultra Sound/Downloading.

"I want a natural birth, no make-up, no lip gloss, no..."

Pregnant woman wearing a 'baby' shirt and a man wearing a 'big baby' shirt.

You have to do WHAT to get that kid out of there?

'He's more supportive after his nap.'

Impractical Guide to Having Babies: 'Break Water'

Though initially enthusiastic about natural childbirth, the Millers felt their midwives took the concept too far.

Doctor delivers sonogram results, which include the baby's sex, his claustrophobia, his taste for trashy women...'

A Bun in the Oven.

"Gone to ante natal class.There's a bun in the oven."

'Your pediatrician? No. . . I'm your baby's college admissions representatives.'

"I realise that it shows a lack of maturity .. But I like baby talk."

'The tests are pretty conclusive, Mrs. Kane. It's going to be a brat.'

Mary, remember that you're pregnant and are now eating for 2,000.

Obstetrics.

Push, push, push...

Impractical Guide to Having Babies: 'Nurse forgets her husband's birthday'

'Welcome to pre-natal kindergarten. First we'll review your pre-born's cirriculum and then I'll assign womb numbers.'

'My mom's pregnant. At first I was worried about the competition until I remembered that I was the incumbent.'

'My husband wants to know if the sonogram can tell if the baby is a Red Sox or Yankees fan.'

'I was going to ask my parents for a baby brother but I sure won't now.'