Executive Thinker T-Shirts

'My last comment appeared to be inviting feedback. Do not be fooled.'

"Those are wonderful insights jack but we're, Looking for actual ideas."

'Bad news sir, we've discovered a bigger fish in our pond.'

'I believe in reasoning with my opponents unless I have something on them.'

'Now that I have your attention...'

"There, but for the grace of God, and the contract with Satan, go I."

"The problem is that our ads have either been too Jewish or not Jewish enough."

'I hoodwink... but I don't consider myself a hoodwinker.'

Efficiency Expert Greeting

"I'm Jackson, your new micro-manager."

The Department of Really Stupid Ideas: 'Most people think they just appear out of thin air! But the truth is, there's a great deal of very hard work involved!'

'And were there a point to your proposal, Henderson - What would it be?'

The Businessmen Have to Make Decisions from Many Options

"Stock options for your thoughts."

"Here's what I'm gonna do."

'It has come to my attention that we need to hedge against our five-year plan.'

"Be patient. He'll have to visit the water cooler sooner or later."

Employee won't think about work outside of box

"We can waste time and look for a solution or...just find a scapegoat?"

'You think I'm crazy; I think you're crazy...finally some common ground!'

"We need a best practice swim lane to leverage our core competency, move the needle outside the box, and open the kimono while keeping our ducks in a row. Can anyone give me a sustainable solution to more vertical effectiveness without getting too granula

'I want you to paddle against the current.'

"What was I thinking?!"

'I am willing to concede that the company has been underperforming of late...'

"Is it just a scary coincidence that the words 'changes' and 'unknown' both have 7 letters?"

'Do you want to tell them their department is being downsized again, or should I?'

"You're a genius, Shaw. This is an idea whose copyright has expired."

"Based on the feedback from advisers whom I haven't beheaded, all of my ideas are great."

"Serendipity is not a strategy."

"He's his own worst enemy."

"What's wrong with swallowing up other companies?"

US v.s. Tech Giants

Target your customer.

'Our job will be to drag the competition down to our level.'

'Ladies and gents, the executive-worker pay ratio is not what it used to be!'