Executive Order Enthusiast Gifts

"Mr. President, we only have a few more executive order sheets left. Should I order a new pad?"

"Stock options for your thoughts."

Golly, �1m a year isn't too much. I don't know why your shareholders don't understand you.

"Well, that's created a little order in a world of chaos."

'Ladies and gents, the executive-worker pay ratio is not what it used to be!'

'Not exactly what I meant by job creation.'

"If CEO pay packets aren't a problem, why doesn't everyone get one?"

'Our strategy is perfect! This is the customers' fault - they don't think the way WE do!'

"Profits. Good thing or the greatest thing?"

"Executive shoeshine and bald head buff, sir?"

"You're an overweight, overpaid, over-the-hill senior executive, Dalrymple. What did you have in mind to remedy that situation?"

"It drives me MAD when people whine about the amount top management get paid. . ."

'Can you remember where you were when you first realized you were full of crap?'

A businessman sits with an executive toy of smokestacks.

Goodyear Blimp flying round globe.

I Have A Closed Mind.

'Another corporation I wouldn't have minded so much, but this was a hostile takeover by my secretary!'

"Not bad! ...For a duck."

"It's recently come to my attention that all government agencies are doing absolutely nothing. You're all fired."

"I like your paperweight, Watkins..."

'So, she's decided to buy the helicopter.'

"Patel confirmed"

"Sorry, that was the three cups of coffee, four cans of red bull, and double dose of Paxil talking."

'Surround our project with lots of useless extras so our critics have something to pick at while we ram our proposals through.'

"I've got a lot on my plate right now. For starters, I need to sharpen my pencil, refill my coffee and get a new comb."

"Dear, what the name of that company I'm the CEO of again?"

"Mr. Kendall would like to see one of those flashes of oddball humor."

"Gentlemen, when I consider the mess we've made of this company, I can only commend our foresight in not investing any of our own money in it."

'But RG, you can't be a big fish in all the big ponds...you can only be a big fish in your big pond.'

"They say you can't cheat an honest man. I say 'Bull'!"

Ex-CEO, will work for millions.

"That happy little cloud floating over the Unicorp Building? I want that."

'I thought you were ousted as CEO.' 'I was. But with my golden parachute I bought the company. I'm Baaack!'

Wealth Management: V.P. of Flaunting It and V.P. of Having It.

'I need to snoop around, ask questions, get in touch with my feminine side.'