
"Before we begin, I'd like to say that in thirty years as an attorney, I've never encountered a more interesting departure from the standard last will and testament."
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"Before we begin, I'd like to say that in thirty years as an attorney, I've never encountered a more interesting departure from the standard last will and testament."
'I said you're next, Hibblemeyer. . . Hibblemeyer!'
Jars containing a Brain and a Brain Fart.
'Make him laugh, make him cry.'
A rare picture of Henry VIII's divorce lawyer.
"We have a favor to ask."
'You might want to try another photographer, Sire. This one tends to cut the heads off.'
'Mind if I head off a little early today?'
"Guess who's going to be on national television apologizing to the American public."
Happy Birthday to you... Thanks guys!
"No need to give me credit . . . I'll just take it."
"On the plus side, you're on the cover of all the major business publications."
"I always say; 'You don't need to spend a lot of money to have a good time on a first date."
William Tell Executions.
"Look, you took a huge fashion risk and it just didn't work out for you."
'Who ordered the chef's head?'
STRIP "Looks like the escalators on the blink again"
'Of course the swing is important, just don't allow it to pull focus from the neck.'
Divers attache BITE ME sign to companion's oxygen tanks.
"What about the writers? Nobody ever blames the writers!"
"Heads or entrails?"
'My work clothes are at the cleaner's, so I had to borrow my kid's hoodie.'
'I had hoped for some great farewell jokes!'
Executioner with golf bag full of axes
'Henry, I wish you weren't so cheap and would hire a divorce lawyer.'
'We're going to have to cut back a little this year ....'
"Gee—it's just like in the movies!"
'If I hear one more person say 'Just a little of the top' I'm going to lose it!'
Louie 'The Egg' Spignoli, The Hangman's Nightmare
"We need 6 last meals over at table 9."
"Try some improv, they said. The king will it, they said!"
Congratulations you are the 10,000.
'I don't suppose an apology would suffice?'
'Governor's Pardon is on the way, Bob. Hang in there.'
"One final question... how did you hear about us/"
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