Evolutionary Biology Gifts

"If you're thinking of evolving, don't bother."

I

'How do you propose to support my daughter on the income of an amphibian?'

'The coast is clear!'

"Life?...in a nutshell?...we compete for access to women."

In the future, human thought will enter an age of clarity and purity never before dreamed of.

"I groom all day and still look like a baboon."

"I said the males were 'evolving' – I didn't say they were 'maturing.'"

"Finches, don't look now, but there's a creepy guy staring at our beaks."

'Some of those youngsters have come up with a terrific new idea - feathers.'

'Take it from me and come back. The future is definitely on land.'

Figures from 'Ascent of Man' diagram all do the Conga: 'Let's all fo the Conga, na-na-na-na ...'

"Frankly, I can't wait until I evolve into a bird..."

"We just haven't been flapping them hard enough."

Ascent of Machine.

'It's really more of a family forest than a family tree.'

"I know. Let's wait here until we evolve to an upright position. Then we could reach it."

"Walk, hell- I gotta dance."

'Oh, so now the ocean isn't GOOD enough for you?'

'Everybody has to change to compete.'

Evolution Exam Results.

'If, as you say, they're so evolved, why do they need to wear clothes to survive?'

'We'll never be able to eat it all before it spoils -- how about a rabbit or something instead?'

"Darling, I think we need to talk about where this relationship is going..." Male evolution.

"It's the dawn of a new era"

"Admit it, we're lost."

'Seriously, in this day and age, how can people still believe in this nonsense that we have evolved from microbes...?'

"Walking erect is very trendy now."

'Some of these trees have been here for 2000 years... and they still can't talk. Man, we're awesome!'

Evolution of man, starting at ameba through to computer

Charles Darwin Book Signing.

Evolution.

"I'm an evolution denier. There's no way those people come from us."

"We evolved from asteroids"

I told you we were late!