Everyday Theorist T-Shirts

'The way I got it doped out, post-modern man is all context and fragment.'

'Thanks to the internet it is now possible to be extremely well-informed and completely wrong at the same time!'

Sigmund Freud.

"I never subscribed to Hobbes' state of nature theory until the night we left the kids without a sitter."

'I'm down to a pack of neuroses a day.'

"Bonk!"

"Must be another paradigm shift."

"It's hard being a grownup, too – did you know we have absolutely zero limits on treats?"

"Sure, it's a break you can live with... but screw one more socket and you're toast!"

"Of course you can't put your finger on it. It's a hypothetical particle."

"Scientists confirmed today that everything we know about the structure of the universe is wrongedy-wrong-wrong."

'So much for Newton. Now, as for Einstein...'

Capital

'Sorry, Professor Kleinzweck -- your 'Chaos Theory' program just crashed.'

"I've figured out why my life is boring."

'Lately, I've been thinking a lot about evolution. My theory is that it all points to 'survival of the fattest'.'

"Sure I can't pop that in a bag for you, sir?"

'Yes, Dear, they are very pretty shoes!'

'I know Jesus spoke in parables. Now for the last time, tell me exactly where you put my car keys.'

"I've done nothing Instagrammable for months."

"Is that it? Is that the Grand Unified Theory?"

"I can't eat these nutrition bars. They're for women."

Mankind

"Is this a good time to bring up a car problem?"

"This was Professor Brunzberg's office. He spent half his life trying to solve this equation and the other half he has spent wondering who actually cares about this crap."

'The Human Comedy needs a laugh track.'

The Jerck Manual

'I think a PowerPoint presentation would have sufficed for your project on the Big Bang Theory Jenkins!!'

Economics as Rocket Science

"Entanglement meets string theory."

The Origin of Species

Man and woman with laundry

Evolution explained.

"No, son - the love of Monday is not the root of all evil."

Evolution