Ethical Issues Explorer Gifts

'They're the ideal temp workers! Easy to train, industrious, punctual... And with a thirteen-day life-span, they conveniently die before collecting a paycheck!'

Ethics exam cheater.

"To torture an insect or not to torture an insect, that is the question."

Squeezing the Free Press.

'You'll like this, gang ? it's an 'eyes-only' list of 'shady-but-tolerated' loopholes allowed by the Securities and Exchange Commission.'

"I guess it's ethical. Let me run it through my 'Ethics Check' app."

"It's a memo from the legal department reminding us to (heh-heh), 'keep our noses clean'."

"I'm not having it if it's been genetically modified."

'Er . . . and a fork for me...'

Meet the Enemy

"I'm new here. How much do we leave for a tip?"

"Maybe we should have brought a Riesling."

"In a further effort to increase profits, control costs and satisfy shareholders, we've decided to steal stuff."

'What worried me most is identity theft.'

'This is from a post-ethics phase.'

'You won't believe this, but even if the vaccine works, they wont give it to other sick mice.'

"Hi, Bob - your consultants have just arrived."

"Moulting"

'You're in luck. Business ethics is a gray area.'

Stoneage business ethics: 'But, hey, this 'ethics' stuff isn't carved in stone!'

'We were kind of hoping to let our CONSCIENCE be our guide.'

'Please remember, it's not a lie if it turns a profit.'

Experience is important, so I'm inclined to leave questions of ethics to those who have them.

"Just what is a runcible spoon?"

Tragically Moses didn't see the eleventh commandment.

"Ah yes, I know this bit...it's from the advert!"

'Bob was eventually arrested and charged with outsider trading.'

'It's either the worst idea to attract new clients I've ever seen, or the best...'

These drug will cost you an arm and a leg...the good news is, my wife and I own stock in the company that makes them.

'Now you see, that's EXACTLY what we should try to avoid here.'

"It's badly sprained, McElroy, and you know as well as I do that I'd only slow you down. Go on without me—and that's a direct order!"

"How many times have I told you? No trading Asian market at the dinner table."

"I have to admit Dick Cheney makes a strong argument for torture. But I still think torturing him would be wrong."

"Red wine with fish? Sometimes you really are a monster."

"They have oat fiber, wheat fiber, and rice fiber, but no moral fiber."