Ethical Foodie Gifts

'I have to break into houses to fund my addiction to organic and fair trade produce.'

Cat Food Not Tested On Animals

Vegetarian Society "In the wake of all these health scares we've changed our message somewhat."

"You just HAD to order the free range chicken, didn't you?"

"That is cave bear. Free range bear better ethical choice."

It's locally grown and organically raised! I'm not eating it. You can't kill and animal "humanely." Dead's dead! And food is delicious! Where else will humane treatment ever start? With your family? They have raised you locally.

'Nowadays we want all our food to be ethically sourced, Personally I'd be happy if it was all chocolated sauced,'

'I've moved from being vegetarian to a dairy free Paleo diet...'

"Oh, and they found metal fragments in our chicken wings again. We're altering the label to say they're now higher in iron."

"Sorry, I refuse to eat anything that has a face."

"I don't know what it is, but I think you can sleep well knowing it's locally grown."

What do you mean you prefer the sound of the sign of the right?! What part of 'either way we're dead' do you not understand?

"Wait—did you procure that worm humanely?"

View to the Future

"Wild-caught, farm-raised, lab-grown, beach-found, or aquarium-harvested."

'I'm a vegetarian.' - 'If it's so wrong to eat animals, why are they made out of meat?'

"Mom, I'm at work – let me call you back after I finish stocking milk for wealthy vegans who like beet juice in their meat alternatives so they can still get that bloody effect when cooking without guilt."

'Is it guilt that when you eat us that we are no longer called pigs but bacon, pork chops or ham?'

'May future generations forgive you for eating that sausage...'

"Is the asparagus farm-raised or wild-caught?"

'I'm from P.E.T.A.. Are you the one who called about animal-rights abuses?'

"The lobster dinner is thirty eight dollars, or for ten dollars extra you can have him returned to the sea."

'Now, think hard about it: Do you want to be known as the one who ate the last Dodo?'

'Personally I can't see anything wrong with GM crops!'

'It's going to be a vegan.'

'We have Vanilla, Chocolate and Strawberry on your choice of Cedar, Oak or Elm cone...'

"They say we destroy plants – such as potatoes, corn and carrots – and they're boycotting us. They're fruitarians."

"Being vegan or vegetarian isn't enough anymore. From now on I will only cook stuff I stepped in on the sidewalk."

"We would like to be genetically modified to taste like Brussels sprouts."

'And we'll give you all the carcinogens you can eat.'

Stuffing the turkey.

"On second thought, just give me the ham and forget the roast beef."

"All our vegetables are organic, ethically sourced and stunned before being boiled."

Vegetarian Nightmare.

A boy who loves cows/burgers