Ethical Economist Gifts

Dollar: Warning - May cause excessive greed, loss of human empathy and disregard for vital environmental systems.

'Here's where accounting went all ethical on us.'

'Well, technically speaking, we do have a conscience...'

"Do you know that we saved a ton of money on legal fees by being more ethical?"

Ethics (with an eye on the bottom line) committee.

Pharmaceutical industry versus public health.

A new client wants a big-time landscaping redesign. Terrific! We can sure use the money. There is a moral issue. Overdue. He wants chemical lawn care? Worse. His money's from a big bank bonus. Finally! The economy trickled down on us!

"It's bastards like you that give us all a bad name!"

Panama Papers

'We're at a complete disadvantage, Sir! Our enemies are manufacturing missiles with cheap Third-World sweatshop labor!'

'Apparently it's some sort of humanitarian special offer.'

'Anybody here not in favor of obscene profits?'

Enhanced Pedophilia Interrogation Techniques

"Stock options for your thoughts."

"Everyone at Megadrug is committed to the benefits of spoken therapies, which is why we developed 'nitrazone' to enhance the experience."

'You'll like this, gang ? it's an 'eyes-only' list of 'shady-but-tolerated' loopholes allowed by the Securities and Exchange Commission.'

Build your very own conflict of interest!

"I guess it's ethical. Let me run it through my 'Ethics Check' app."

The Department of Blind-Side Bias, Knowledge Gaps and Really Great Coffee.

"When faced with a tricky ethical issue, I always ask the question, 'What's in it for me?'"

Build Your Own Portfolio

Feedback should be sought for genuine reasons, not because you want compliments. . .

"The little engine that could... after taking advantage of family connections, a trust fund, working two years for free as an intern, and finally getting hired as an independent contractor."

"Imagine if only 1/2 the companies that claimed to have a great culture actually did."

Thrift: New way to eat eggs (avoid needless transport costs).

'One final question: Have you ever been disciplined, investigated or suspended for integrity on the job?'

'Let's hope the new norm means that less really is more.'

"We'd better watch Cranston. He looks like a whistleblower."

Water company bonus.

'So, gentlemen, how's the dollar trading against the immortal soul, today?'

"C'mon people! All for me and me for me!"

'This is Harris, he's been with the firm some 45 years!'

"In the current market, it's just more practical."

'You won't believe this, but even if the vaccine works, they wont give it to other sick mice.'

"At First Infidelity we're all about integrity...."