Errand Escapist T-Shirts

"I forgot why I came in here, but maybe I just came in here to forget."

Woman dreaming about being on vacation.

Tree house.

Last Chance For Reality

He kept pretending he was going to work when he was just running errands.

"Harold! Don't forget to get the eggs!"

"Dear, will you sprint down to the store and get a box of wheat germ and a pint of yoghurt?"

"Lemme guess: You forgot the basil Mom asked for, and my ice cream is in your briefcase?"

"I had a dream about a huge flaming rock falling from the sky! What do you think it means?"

'You're so sophisticated and witty...and muscular...do you work out? Why, yes, I'd love to come back to your place.'

"One of you boys go help Mom with the groceries."

"Mr. Jenkins' idea of paradise is a never occupied loo, a big flat screen with hundreds of free sports channels and a fridge that always gets refilled with beer and pizza."

"He went that-a-way." (snail escapes).

Zoo Employees

Man opens front door to find he's up in clouds.

"Not now, Elaine—I'm on my man-cloud."

Why do you hate blockbuster movies? Why do you hate documentaries? I don't. I love spending two hours watching the very life I'm trying to escape. Oooh, fun, bittersweet insights into the complexities of living in modern life. Document this! My camera lens isn't wide enough.

"I've half a mind to protest."

'Honey, I just ran into the store. Did you need me to pick anything up while I'm here?'

'If you keep running away, son, you'll never make it through your formative years.'

"Anywhere that doesn't have tvs, computers, radios, ipods,cell phones or video games."

I've got no cell phone, no computer, no grumbling wife, no stupid boss. Feel free to envy me.

"I think my life would have been played better set against a Roaring Twenties or Civil War background."

"This is why I hate bringing you shopping."

Message in a bottle.

Sometimes you wanna go where nobody knows your name

Don Quixote

Virtual Reality Check

"You have to ask yourself, is it even worth finding the cheese anymore!"

'Been coming here ever since Florida got crowded.'

"Yo've got to be more specific, Ed. Wake you when what's over?"

ARchie Smith cartoonist

'A lovely area, but not enough waiters!'

"I have no problem with reality. It's just the occasional intrusion of gritty realism that I hate."

'Mission control? We'd like to take an unscheduled spacewalk.'