Enthusiast Of Quirky Encounters Pillows

'This must be your lucky day, madam. Not only am I a Jehovah's Witness - I'm also selling double glazing.'

"Bless You."

Drunk Barber

"Running of the the chickens!? This is crazy! Dad, no one celebrates Hispanic Heritage Month like this!"

'The stuff legends are made of'

One day having a great personality was going to become a crucial evolutionary trait...

"Excuse me, officer, but I believe I'm entitled to one mating call..."

Florist delivers Cactus to Man on Bed of Nails

'You seem pretty wound up today.'

Chiantis In Translation

'You could have just TOLD me we were out of cups!'

'There are no skeletons in the closets but you might have a bit of trouble with those in the back yard.'

'Pavlov's first experiment'

"The Pain may be due to your Yin and Yang being out of alignment, but humour me and lets see if your broken let is part of the problem."

'It was owned by a little ol' lady who didn't drive it. She used a motor scooter on Saturdays.'

Puppet Show from the Stocks

Dentist preparing woodwork drill for dentistry.

'Could you just sign it 'Bobby'.'

'Well,it's been real nice chatting with you Ron,and should you ever fancy a guided tour throughout the City Morgue,here's my card...' (a morgue worker handing over a 'toe tag').

"Believe me, you don't want to know where it all comes from."

"The catch is you only get one chopstick"

"You will meet a tall, dark stranger. Unfortunately, it's a grizzly bear!"

"You shouldn't feel too bad. I think it's remarkable they managed even one jump."

"All day, every day—'There's a goddam fly in here!' It's so hurtful."

"I love our comfortable silences."

"OK, he's hooked–now reel him in."

'Something's wrong here.'

Here lies Rufus J. Tosser. Inventor of the boomerang hand grenade.

'Of course he's not all there.'

The Ekert Saga: '...We'll be safe...as long as the Ekert is kept in the sacred vessel of nay-chaw. And he has to stay in theah until we find the anti-Ekert.'

Loterie Francaise...

Madam Zelga

It's kind of my thing – I only eat hat people.