Entertainingly Lazy Gifts

"This could be a job for....Slothman. Nahhh."

"I AM at my usual position."

"Doesn't seem like 6 hours on the couch, but you can't argue with a lethargy tracker."

"Would you get me a beer from the refrigerator? Just grab one of the cans on the top shelf. Come on, I do so much for you—all these years, the walks, the food, the chases... Come on! Never mind."

Atlas with the earth, says: 'So then I thought, Why not just roll the damn thing?'

"C'mon, you can do this! Be the sock!"

'Can you mow the lawn? The kids can't find their trampoline.'

"Fetch me another Sculpin IPA."

"This is the way I like it - I pretend to be asleep and he doesn't bother me."

'My husband likes to have everything handy during TV commercials.'

Fetch the Boomerang

"Ed's not really into binge watching...he just can't find the remote."

'Dad, is this like ... you doing your own thing?'

"These are smart socks. They will crawl themselves to the clothes hamper when you throw them on the floor. Make sure they're charged before wearing them."

'It took months of training but now she'd rather sip a martini than fetch a ball.'

"Doc, I think I'm suffering from insomnia...every ten minutes the boss bursts into my office and wakes me up!"

"I'm sort of hesitant to remind him that his work-from-home days are over starting Monday."

"It's the naps you don't take that you regret the most."

"Think of it -- you'd never have to fold another shirt."

"As always he found a way to duck out of working overtime!"

Labradoodle/Labradon't-le

'You're so sophisticated and witty...and muscular...do you work out? Why, yes, I'd love to come back to your place.'

"I'm too lazy to chase cars. Thanks to phones, I now just track them."

Do it yourself - Get someone else to do it

'Inactive wear'

"I think I'll sleep in tonight!"

Laundry baskets labelled 'pajamas' and 'not pajamas'.

"I just got home. Let me roost a bit."

'OK, my dinner's in the oven. Where's the oven?'

"Fetch? You fetch it - you're nearer to it than I am."

'I don't think that lifting the remote control counts as exercise!'

'I will make an appointment to visit with a financial planner, dear--right after I get done taking down the Christmas lights.'

"Being a lazy slob is part of my identity. Keep on nagging and I'll report you to our diversity officer!"

Sloth on a hammock.

"Is this a creative nap or a nap nap?"