Engaging In Workplace Drama Gifts

"He took it back—why can't you?"

"Another job well done by your conflict resolution specialist."

'The staff is being reduced. The exit strategy will be explained at a meeting to be held, after work, in the parking lot.'

"If I made as much as him, I could retire in a couple of days"

'We're going to need to find a scapegoat.'

"It's a wonderful partner's desk-but we think they didn't get along."

'I didn't realize we'd employed a cyber bully in you, Miss Tweedy.'

"Anyone else see weaknesses in my report?"

Cog-In-The-Wheel

You have a major fiasco at 10:30, followed by a shocking scandal at 2:15.

"Hate to see you leave—you were my favorite puppet."

"Geoffrey always was a bit of a loose cannon.."

Unfortunately, Lyle had already sent nasty e-mails to his boss, three vice-presidents and the CEO.

"After being shorted on his bonus, Earl the maintenance man decided to remove all the toilet paper from the executive washrooms."

"There's no business deductions like show business deductions."

"It's the never-ending struggle between the State Department and the Department of Defense."

"You're not the 'Yes Man' you used to be, Smilby."

"Bentley, I don't care if you are my heir apparent. Stop peeking in here fifty times a day!"

Worldwide Global Conglomerate, Takeover Division: 'FRIENDLY',,,'HOSTILE',

'I wish you would come to me first with your grievances, instead of going directly to the United Nations Committee on Human Rights.'

'Pay no attention to him. He's just a disgruntled former employee.'

"...type yourself a letter of apology for what I did at the office party last night."

See? This is precisely why we don't encourage office romances.

'Hoskins, I'd like to congratulate you on your leadership initiative... and if I didn't feel threatened, I'd keep you on.'

The fax machine had stopped and they did not know why.

"I don't know about you guys, but I'm very disappointed in the severance package."

You want to watch it here, a lot of back-stabbing goes on.

"Bad news. I've been fired! I was mouthing silent obscenities at the boss and forgot we don't wear masks at work anymore."

The Last Husband and Wife Team Hired

'... and sign it 'shovingly up yours'.'

'The staff is getting slack Simkins - mention the word 'redundancy'.'

'Just for the minutes did anyone manage to catch the chairman's parting words?'

'What makes you think our office is bugged?'

"I take it this empty folder is your final and entire contribution to the project."