Employment Minister Pillows

'These politicians have internalized the saying 'To give is better than to take'. First, they give attention to the jobless people and later, they take away the unemployment benefits.'

'Do you think, perhaps, that we could start shooting for a few longer-term goals around here?'

I hope a starting salary of 80 and a severance of 12 is acceptable....

"I'm afraid I can't green-light anything - you'll just have to pray."

It soon became apparent that the vicar was an undercover journalist.

"Do you, Darlene, take Jim to be your lawfully wedded husband, when you could, clearly, do far better?"

'Why didn't he take 8 days and finish the job properly?'

'She's a very protectice mother!' - Lifeguard at Christening/Baptism.

"We stumbled onto a house - and both of us being young and in love and quick to grasp the situation - "

"So, I see you have a background in advertising..."

37 years in the same position.

'Now I kinda wish we had planned a bigger wedding.'

"Stepping on the gown never works. They run faster without it."

'Mildred-thy milk runneth over!'

"It's OK, I'm preordained."

"I said he's beginning to teethe...not tithe."

"Will you stand by him through humiliating revelation after humiliating revelation, and then-once you're sure it couldn't possibly get any worse-when even more humiliating revelations come to light?"

'...We apologise for any inconvenience this may cause..."

'Do you promise to love, honor and remain co-dependent until death do you part?'

"The Lord works in mysterious ways, I mean, alpacas? What are they? It’s like Bob Seger mated with a llama."

"Black or white, Vicar?"

'Today's sermon is on Eve and Adam....'

Kid to pastor: 'Which office is heaven?'

Recruiting litigation lawyers is ALWAYS tricky..my last one took me to court for the emotional and professional damage I caused him by NOT considering him for a position I wasn't asked to fill.

"And now, Marla and Dave will text their own vows."

Two priests share a laugh outside a confessional booth

Night-time halo

"Wait 'til my Dad hears about this!"

'Just ask yourself -- Are you better off now than you were two thousand years ago?'

'Pick a contract...any contract!'

"Lost my job. But I'm pretty sure it's around here somewhere."

Golfing Bishop.

"When you say the meek will inherit the earth, does that include the mineral rights?"

'Tell us the story of Moses again -- I like the chase scene!'