Employment Agency Staff Prints

"I'm available every day except one."

Temp Employment Agency. Ah, I see that you have a short attention span.

Temporary Worker Bee

'I had to quit my job at the colander factory. I couldn't take the strain.'

'You're in luck - we do have a temporary position in advertising'.

Just Another Brick In The Wall, temporary workers.

EMPLOYMENT AGENCY, 'While my reserve unit was guarding the Iraqi border, an illegal alien took my job.'

'He's written some great slogans and some great labels, but he's never written a great coupon.'

'Yes I'm sure we can find an opening for you, Mr Smith!'

'I'm not here looking for a job. I'm the temp who's replacing you when the boss fires you today.'

"Well, I have an opening in Cloverdale Mall ... let me hear you say Ho Ho Ho."

"Would you like something you're under qualified for, or something you're overqualified for?"

ROBOT EMPLOYMENT AGENCY, 'We don't have much on hand right now --how'd you like to be a Pez dispenser?'

Employment Agency. I didn't hire him -- Those bipedal guys are are afraid to get their hands dirty.

'...I know just the man, I'll send him right over.'

'Hello, is that the employment agency? It's about the domestic you sent me.'

"I'm from the Duvall Executive Search Agency, and I leave no stone unturned."

When staffing agencies screw up.

Jobs for graduates

"Can you perform under pressure?"

Corporate Advertising Agency: WEEKLY SCAM MEETING

"Sorry, we have to let you go. You've grown too tall for our cubicles."

'Now that they've got a new Pope, there aren't any openings for old guys.'

"Take the goldfish. If it's still alive in six months, call us for another interview."

"We've checked, and it's fine with women."

"Any talents besides tasting good?"

"Do you get the impression poster companies don't like us?"

Overly wordy travel.

'Relax, you are in doggy heaven. I'm just from a temp service.'

'I've never read such stupid twaddle in all my life, I like it'

'It's not a punchline to an office joke or TV commercial, Perkins. 'You're Fired' - for real!'

"Of course the extra costs of the 'minimum wage' has had an impact upon our recruitment policies...we have to be a lot more selective!"

'I'm the new chairman the temp agency sent over.'

'Employment agency: We have lots of jobs for robots, apps, drones.'

"I like your resume, Andy. It shows you're smart, a good worker and full of potassium!"