Empires T-Shirts

'We only stay together for the sake of the Holy Roman Empire.'

'I'm reading aloud, Jeremy - My lips are SUPPOSED to be moving!'

'My reading comprehension is so-so, but I do make up for it with my highlighting skills.'

Business books - Who's Who & Who's Downsized sections.

Accelerated reading. Slowpoke reading,

"Hmm...well...It'll look better when it's finished...!"

Dog chews 'The Cat Book'.

The Dorrie Decimal System

"I don’t know what your invention’s called, but it’s really irritating."

No-Work Orange

Blue Stockings

"I got super baked in the shire and accidentally recruited these four little weirdos for the most important mission of all time."

"No writers were harmed or mistreated in the preparation of this story."

Television Readers.

Bookworm Sleepover

"My novel is not a doorstop!"

Fairy Library - Frontispiece to Jack and the Beanstalk

Silence of the Chickens...

'According to creation mathematicians, all of Euclid's theories were originally found etched into rocks.'

Paranormal A-Z...

You do know it's Harry Potter who's real and JK Rowling is just one of his spells?

"I've come across a rather disturbing find, Carstairs!"

Audio Books

T. S. Eliot Meets Beavis And Butthead

"His exercise wheel has lost all its fascination sinces he started reading Hemingway."

Flyfishing for dummies.

Wishing Well, Wishing Good.

'I have a best selling novel on the tip of my tongue...'

Goodnight Moon for the Misbegotten

"Not that I have the time, but I enjoy reading."

Around the Dogbox in 80 Days.

'HA Ha! One good idea doesn't make a genius!'

"It's about sex and revenge, except for a short chapter on the Continental Congress."

Birds reading over woman's shoulder