Emotional Shows Gifts

'She got all the soap opera channels at a discount -- it's some kind of 'frequent cryer' program.'

'I always cry at weddings!'

Succession 2

'I still have mood swings, but music has given me a way at last to monetize them.'

A man sews broken hearts back together.

"The family has spent all week crafting a beautiful service of words and pictures - far too sentimental to be of practical use."

Franz Kafka does stand-up...

'This has a great ending...he shoots her.'

'You see son, it's jobs like these that give us a bad name...'

'If you're going to stare at that thing all day, at least watch something educational,,, like Japan,'

'Come on, you big softy, admit it: Those were real tears at the end of the movie...'

"I broke off the relationship, then came the endless reminders, the sad letters and emails...It's tough cancelling a subscription."

Joe Hundredaire

Bootmaker upset over the death of a long term customer

"We've just crossed the line between binge viewing and OCD viewing."

"Good news, Mrs. Jennings! The lump in your throat isn't cancer, it's from watching a lot of sad movies."

The Great Banzinni discovers the oldest trick in the book.

Billy Box lived here...Oh, no he didn't...Oh, yes he did.

"Omigod! It's the breakfast I made him for his birthday!"

"Sorry I'm late, I was at a funeral, paying my respects to the old man who used to feed me at the park every day. . ."

"Did I miss something?"

A magician sees his suitcase with swords in it on the luggage conveyor belt.

"Decision time folks! Will you come back next week and try for the baby?"

"Enjoy the movie, and try not to cry too loud at the end when the dog comes home."

Too late they realized they'd awarded 1st place to a mop.

"I'm getting really tired of this cancel culture."

Psychologist has a happy mask on.

"Thank you! And now for my finale, I shall produce a magician from the hat."

'I can't believe they made a sequel.'

The night

Touch Gig

'Let's set aside your rhythm issues for a moment and work on your blues.'

I miss...

The children at their cousin's grave

'The Bachelor is on at 8 but don't go getting any ideas.'