Emergency Scenario Lover Prints

"Um...does anyone have any experience in CPR or aeroplane driving."

"Little help?"

Who should I call first? 911 or Technical Support?

"Could you tilt the Earth just a bit more away from the light?"

"Let me through – I'm morbidly curious!"

"The medic said he died of an ST-segment-elevated myocardial infarction -- Jack was always a showoff."

'Hanging around the house, Fred, just in case.'

"We have a favor to ask."

'Relax. This is only a test.'

Tsunami Evac Route

"Can't we just go after sailfish...?"

"The blaze has taken hold on the eight floor Chief. The C.E.O., V.P. and C.O.O. are trapped in the boardroom!!"

"My God, now what?"

"It's marzipan pigs."

The Consequences of an Interrupted Shower.

'Kitchen! Chicken Bone! Hurry!!' - Rent-A-Surgeon

'Oh - It's you.'

Why dogs hate CPR.

"I've got a pulse!"

'I'm a doctor... This man needs someone who can grant me immunity from liability, and FAST!'

'Aunt Joan and Uncle Wally took Luci to the emergency room.'

'Hold it, you can cancel that STAT call.'

'He thinks we're watering down the cement.'

"We ran into a marathon."

"Sorry I'm late: I was hitching a ride but when the driver noticed me, he panicked and we had an accident..."

"Hello, A and E, which department do you need, stabbing, shooting or general GBH?"

'Just this once sir, we need the overtime.'

"Whoa...not so fast! First of all please tell me your address, your health insurance number, and spell your name for me, Mr. HelpI'mBleedingToDeath."

Man with mobile phone says: 'I can't call for help, I'm filming this for the TV news.'

Self-driving fire engine...quickly responds to an alarm.

'You'd better clear out some rooms, nurse. He jumped off a bridge, and all his friends are behind him.'

"Last question, and how would you rate the ambulance response time to today's accident?"