Emergency Medicine Pillows

line of life

"If our ambulance hadn't hit you, you might be waiting ten or fifteen minutes for another one."

Emergency room notice - 'Wait hours, or go home'

"Tell her the surgeon is the best in his field and she'll get through this fine!"

"Get me some help. Quickly. When I touched him our static electricity zapped his pace maker."

"I'd love to chat longer, but I've got to get this guy to a hospital."

"Hello, A and E, which department do you need, stabbing, shooting or general GBH?"

'Your son is fine, but tell him to stay away from the milk.'

Casualty Crash Team.

'Stre-e-e-e-tch-her?'

Advertisements for 'Brother Marsh- faith healer and Deacon 'Speed' Alton- emergency room'.

'You don't have time for a second opinion, Mr. Garvey. We've got to cut to the chase!'

'How's my son? He swallowed 50p?'

"If you don't want stitches, that's fine. Suture self."

A paramedic-in-training's nightmares.

The Sting Operation

"I swear, he's just doing this to annoy me."

A female patient in an exam room sees a sign that reads, 'Break glass in case of physician burnout'

"Now, how can I be of assistance?"

"She's in a conversationally induced coma."

First aid in mountains

"He's going to be O.K., but he still wants you to remarry."

Who should I call first? 911 or Technical Support?

Teddy bear being taken to hospital.

"I'm sure he'll pull through. He's always been a real fighter."

Ship upsidedown in a bottle has rescue boat in bottle next to it.

In case of overcrowding in the ER break glass.

Don't worry, the first 30 years as a paramedic are the hardest.

"Let me through – I'm morbidly curious!"

Things Mothers don't want to hear from their five year olds...

'I've decided I'm going to be a fireman when I grow up.'

'If it don't hurt, don't mess with it!'

"Let me through - I'm a bonsai tree surgeon."

'Is it urgent?'

'Where does it hurt?'