Emergency Medic Pillows

Who should I call first? 911 or Technical Support?

A female patient in an exam room sees a sign that reads, 'Break glass in case of physician burnout'

"Now, how can I be of assistance?"

"If you don't want stitches, that's fine. Suture self."

First aid in mountains

"He's going to be O.K., but he still wants you to remarry."

Department of No One Could Have Anticipated

Teddy bear being taken to hospital.

"I'm sure he'll pull through. He's always been a real fighter."

Don't worry, the first 30 years as a paramedic are the hardest.

In case of overcrowding in the ER break glass.

"Let me through – I'm morbidly curious!"

'Where does it hurt?'

Fred's not sure who to call first: 911 or the plumber he should have called in the first place.

Policeman giving paramedics a fine.

Doctor Flattened By The ER Rush

Paramedics.

'In a pig's eye, you say!'

'How long did you try before calling?'

'For my family, Christmas and New Year's Eve is the busiest time... my husband is a spirits dealer and my son is an emergency doctor!'

Hurricane damage to trees

"Tell her the surgeon is the best in his field and she'll get through this fine!"

"Thanks for coming in to work on such short notice."

'Who's your next of kin? When did you last eat or drink? Do you have any allergies? Are you wearing clean underpants?'

Musical Accidents

On his first day as a paramedic Henry suffered Pre-Traumatic Stress Syndrome.

A paramedic-in-training's nightmares.

'Next.'

"The bad news that he was knocked down by an ambulance but the good news is that it's done wonders for our response times!"

Extreme sports injuries ward.

"I'm afraid the shark got your arms and legs. It's probably not a good time, but your brother's here. He needs a kidney."

Emergency: "Waiting long?"

"We'll feel pretty silly if it's downgraded to a tropical storm."

"Quick! Turn the siren on!"

Using a Defibrillator a paramedic can tell if Pinocchio is lying.