Emberalmer Pillows

"If you think he's doing a bad job with this, you should see him trying to wrap a birthday present!!"

'No ice.'

'Will you lot come out! - the new kit's not that bad!'

Text Culture

'I blame global warming!'

"He's got great velocity but his trajectory needs work."

'They've made this 3D football really realistic, it even chucks coins at you.'

"Thursday-Morning Quarterback"

'I wonder what he is thinking about...'

The moles have adapted to the winter weather.

"Sorry, boss, I do care if I ever get back — that was just the peanuts and Cracker Jack talking."

"Have you forgotten you're proposing?"

'Hey, Birdbrain, does the word ozone mean anything to you?'

Wilfried Zaha

"I quit."

"Somebody has screwed-up the seating arrangements" - Seating is an optical illusion.

'I see your site doesn't have a 'like' button. The good news is it doesn't need one.'

'I'm feeling a little remiss about missing both free throws.'

'Last quarter, Jeremy, you dropped two passes. Could you tell our viewers how you plant to catch this pass?'

"And then I met some computer people who could make it look as if I were talking."

Football fans in corona times

Are they dangerous? Only if I shut off the tv.

A field goal kicker kicks his teamate instead of the ball through the goal posts.

Foam finger gets stuck up a foam nose.

Cactus Uses An Umbrella When Raining.

"Would you guys shut up and let me watch the game?"

Expansion 2000: The Baton Rouge Ball Boys

"He always get emotional when th super bow;'s on and the end of football season is finally here..."

"Offside? By a fingertip? It's football not handball!"

Finally, a big puffy hand for the losing team.

Droplet with a pencil.

'Now that's what I call a tackle, Brian!'