Embassy Explorers Gifts

Julian Assange

"This isn't exactly what I had in mind when I told you to go outside and play."

"It's just one monkey at one typewriter, but we've given him an infinite need for validation."

'I may not know about DNA, but I sure as hell know about recombinant.'

'I don't know about the ecosystem, but the economy seems to be on the upswing.'

"I'm studying the effects of prolonged radiation exposure on a panzerotti."

'We've created a teenager!'

"I don’t understand why they aren’t happy, we give them challenging, demanding work and let them do it 80 hours a week!"

Vacancy at the Ecuadoran Embassy

A psychic mows the lawn.

Science fair judge sees flower pot broken on floor near sign saying 'gravity'.

"I assure you I do appreciate what you're feeling."

"The scientists are coming back to study us, so I want you both to be on your best behaviour this time!"

The Oil of Iran

Department of Dot Connection

Codependipity.

The Awkwardly Informal Meet Up Group

God: 'Man has dominion over fish...beasts...and germs have dominion over man.'

'Let's take this step by step -- first, I want you to recognize each other's right to exist.'

'Exactly who is fighting against whom in Syria?'

'Who was Noah's wife?'

'According to the map, we're about to sail off the end of the earth.'

Praying monk with steeple hands.

"I can't believe how deep the potholes are this spring!!"

'I can't talk to you now, I'm on a mission.'

"Dudes - we should make the last booby trap a giant bowling ball!"

What's the first thing you remember? Why do you ask? Because it'll help the cosmologists. Come again? Cosmologists have discovered a lot about the universe. In 1990, they discovered cosmic microwaves are "black body radiation." What that means is, they discovered the microwave radiation that fills the universe conforms exactly to a pattern known as a "black body spectrum" that was predicted by models of the big bang. English!!! They proved the big bang happened. But one of the big questions cosm

'Let's beat it before he realizes he's eating our decoy!'

"I hope it's not contagious."

'It's a selfie.'

Just think, you'll go down in history as the first victim of technology.

"He bought it on holiday."

Homeless Vet - Will fill you in on the origins of my post-traumatic stress $5.

'As you see, it's just a stone's throw from your embassy.'

"You're always so politically correct."