Elephant Lovers Pillows

Spider trap.

Congratulations, Graduate! You're going to be working for peanuts...but with that diploma you'll be getting a whole lot more of them!

1880 Presidential Election- The Republican Animal will Carry the Nation

'Captain, he want's to join up to forget.'

Indian rajah rowing elephant in a monsoon flood.

"Well, I had 'the talk' with him.

'You and your 'Rescue the Reindeer' campaign!'

"Not to brag or anything, but I'm the elephant in the room at my company."

The operation was going extremely well, but then very unexpectedly, he got trampled.

'Of course you're out of gas. You forgot to fill up at the last stop...maybe this will teach you to stop daydreaming.'

'Humans seem to be so weight-conscious: My rider weighs himself before each race...'

Elephant ass selfie.

"Okay, you can keep 'em, but if they grow any bigger, they'll have to sleep in the kitchen."

'Look Daddy: I'm wearing Mummy's shoes...'

The circus diver.

'By Jove, we've finally found it! the fabled elephants' disco!'

"Man, these closed book exams suck! Who could possibly remember all this crap?"

Bob realised that he'd had his binoculars back to front.

'Peekaboo!'

'Yes, the baby should arrive soon: Her nesting instinct is in overdrive!'

"I thought you were getting me a dog?"

Table Of The Elephants

"No need for stage fright, it's just a documentary crew: be yourself..."

"'Course I've seen one before...but never one that ate peanuts!"

'You did remember the condoms didn't you?'

"Once again, I simply don't recall."

'You know what I really like in someone? Bulk!'

Domestic event in the Zoological Gardens No. I. - The nose of the hippopotamus put out of joint by the young elephant

"You finished with your peanuts?"

"I was going to get a cat but they had an offer on."

'You may have found more new customers than the other salesmen, but your profits are too small! Stop just pulling in peanuts, Barry!'

Zoo warden attempting to impress woman visitor

Ernie's spent his entire career studying one species. He says everything else is "irrelephant."

'Jumbo waits for the tusk fairy'

'I told you it would fit.'