Element Detectives Prints

'92 elements in the Universe and you always have to chuck the compound NaCl all over your dinner!'

"He can't decide which one he likes best. . .His leaf blower, his weed wacker, or his metal detector."

'I remember when you used to look for answers using your astute powers of deduction.'

"Hey, the neighbors just installed a new wifi router."

'Let me through, I'm at Doctor.com.'

'What we've got here is a failure to communicate.'

The Style of Elements

"Always remember, sweetheart, that when the service is free, YOU'RE the product!"

'I think the new V. P. of Global Development is here.'

"Does anyone know anything about spyware?"

Gracie's baby toys.

Computer Expert

Where was I?

Terry had a computer bug.

"Tech-support has confirmed it. Screaming and hitting the computer won't solve the problem. You'll have to try something else."

Lies/Damned Lies/Social Media

"Don’t you eyeball me, Ed! That’s right, look down at the table. Only technicians who remember to back up the data can look at me! And if you start to cry I will fire you!"

"Has the Wi-Fi seemed slow to you lately?"

"Well the good news is that we did save a little money by not investing in cyber crime protection...."

'Mark my word, Walters, this is no ordinary virus.'

Roentgen tries to figure out what he's discovered.

"Careful! He knows computers."

"Looks like Brandon got caught with his hand in the password jar."

Clickbait

'Kumor's responsible for all the computer passwords, so the boss had him encrypted.'

Stratigraphy

"Honey, are we watching TV or is it watching us?"

Have you tried turning it off and on again?

We have a problem with your research. We're Encyclopedia Britannica and you're Wikipedia.

'If I've learned anything, it's believe half of what's in the newspapers, and even less of what's in your e-mail.'

'An application won't be necessary, Sir. . . if you did it, we know about it.'

Three-dimensional, eh --- What makes you so spatial?

"Prove you're not a human Select the squares with a bike Skip"

'Should I just hit 'reply to all' and save the government the trouble?'

'I'm sorry, Jason. I don't date anyone new until I've googled them.'