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"Not much of a selection... I guess I'll go with the incoherent geezer."

'Oh, I see you've heard the latest polls.'

'This is exactly the kind of person we should have running the country into the ground.'

'Now ask yourselves... Are you really better off now than you were four years ago?'

''...And defend the Constitution of the United States.' -- And now, I'd like to pardon the following Illinois politicians....'

A Q&A with President Obama over jobs

Archival Warfare

The Berlin Peace Movement

The Current Separation of Church and State Explained.

'His idea of campaign finance reform is insisting on small bills.'

"Exactly how undecided would you say you were at this precise moment?"

"‘Click’, you have reached the White House, press 1 for shameless groveling, 2 for presidential pardons, and please have your credit card details ready..."

'General, please hire large armies of foreign mercenaries to complete the works of death, desolation and tyranny.'

"Hell, George - they even miss ME!"

'In a surprise move, Greece decided to peg its currency against the Baklava.'

'Hi. Due to the regulation fervor, I'm one of the clowns from Washington here to tell you how to run your business.'

"Rescue...we've come to join you."

New York Corruption - Auditor Watson's Death, and Suspicions on Broadway Works Project

Totalitarian Humour

Prostate: 51st State

'Yes, it's a stupid speech, Senator, but you've got to court the stupid VOTE.'

'Steve says that he doesn't understand why the liberals are so glum! They already have a majority.'

Vladimir Putin Pulling Trump Across The Table By His Tie

Donald Trump Tells a Joke...

'That's correct Shaun. The government is comprised of 5 branches...the executive, legislative, judicial, lobbyist and media.'

"Absolutely, Senator, in my mind it was always my country first, and obscene profits second."

The Dangers of Corporate Personhood

"Do you think Trump has read 'Contemporary Relativism and the Death of Meaning'?"

"Ok, ok, climate change is not a hoax!"

'The inaugural address? It's sort of like an opening monologue.'

"How is it in Russia?"

'Poor Americans...If this includes intellectual torture, they'll have to cancel 70 of their Hollywood productions...' (Caption may be modified.)

"Sire, they also want dental."

'It's the consistently defininative obscure obviation coupled with absolute commitment to incomprehensible policy objectives that I find appealing.

"This swamp is much too beautiful to drain.".